Koh Tao is one of those islands where people spend more time underwater than above. And when they are not in the deep blue, just talk about all the fish. If you are not deeply involved in this activity – again, diving – the island may feel a bit exclusive. It’s always challenging to find genuine common ground with mono-interest people. Not impossible, but the odds are against you. And Koh Tao is no exception.

I don’t dive because I don’t like the idea of depending on a bottle that can easily turn into a shitshow. I’d rather be freediving, which I cannot because of my ears (stuck to the surface). Also, fish is just fish. I’m totally in (the water) when there are turtles, whale sharks, or mantas. Otherwise, naah, thanks. I think my (non) excitement is obvious. Anyway, nothing holds us non-divers back from enjoying this semi-small island. Let me give you some hints on how to have a great time here.

DRIVE

WARNING: Koh Tao is for experienced drivers. I first came here in 2015 when the roads were really bad or non-existent. Although the West Coast has become well-developed, the roads can still be tricky sometimes (bumpy, steep, and slippery). If you don’t want to get your mandatory I went to Asia to finally be cool on a scooter injuries or to pay a lot for damages (no insurance on bikes, and they will make you pay as much as they want), don’t want to learn to drive here. At least get some experience before – Koh Phangan or Samui are perfect for that.

SLEEP

If you are a walking backpacker, you should stay around Sairee, where the buzz is. But if you have a scooter, your accommodation can be anywhere. I’ve stayed at the Woodlawn Villas and can highly recommend it if you love being surrounded by jungle, squirrels on palm trees, big rooms, comfy beds, and quietness.

EAT

Even years ago, the island offered plenty of options regarding food. Now it is even more packed with cafés, restaurants, bars, and of course local warungs (damn my Indo-mind, I don’t know what you call these in Thailand). The variety is huge (especially compared to the size of the island), so I only share here my personal favourites:

• Let’s start with the best of the best: KoPPee Espresso Bar & Restaurant. This place is everything; the food, the coffee (the iced cappuccino is top), the atmosphere, and the cold water pool (you’ll understand this later). Perfect for breakfast or lunch, work or siesta. I loved it and visited every day for a week, so I guess that says it all.
• Nui Bakery & Sandwiches Koh Tao offers fresh baked goods, a varied breakfast menu, good coffee, and great service (I like it when they pay attention).
• Zest will surprise you as it is an oldie, and looks like that. But it has one of the best cappuccinos (seriously), the food is tasty, and many divers hang out here, clearly for a reason.
• Tree House Cafe is a super cute Thai restaurant on top of the hill, with a lovely setting and beautiful view, nice food, and strong enough cocktails.
• 995 Roasted Duck and De’Coffee Kohtao have definitely the best local food, super yummy and cheap. Expect some crowd at dinner time.

HIKE

After a substantial breakfast, go for a sweaty hike to burn those calories. Luckily, Koh Tao is a rock island with hills over hills and viewpoints. The John-Suwan Viewpoint is a must-go. Maybe not the best idea to hike up in the middle of the day (in the midst of the greatest heat), but in return, it will most likely be empty, and the view is stunning.

I was very interested in Grape View Point, which apparently has an actual paved road. However, it is at least 45 degrees steep, so either you are prepared for the hike or have a good bike to go all the way. I had none, so I turned back at some point to be on the safe side. Bruh, maybe next time.

Another must-do when visiting Koh Tao is island hopping to Nang Yuan. And here’s an insider tip, you’ll thank me later. The first packed (no joke) tourist boats arrive at 10 am, but the island opens at 9 am (yeah, it has opening hours). So, if you find a private boat (ca. 600-1000THB/boat), you can be there at the opening and have the whole island to yourself for 1 hour before the crowd colonizes it. I did this as a birthday present to myself, and the experience, the empty beach, and the view were priceless.

BEACH

I’m spoiled to the extreme with Indonesian beaches, so sorry, not sorry, the Thai ones are not that mindblowing anymore. Also, the beaches of Koh Tao are really not the main attraction. Beaches are made for working on your tan or having a refreshing swim. You would think. In reality, two factors will wipe your delusions away. Firstly, during the rainy season, low tides rule the daytime, which means pretty much no water (seriously, in some parts, it’s completely gone). Secondly, that little water you can find is like a hot bath, which is everything but refreshing or enjoyable. Here’s why you should rather spend your time at KoPPee. Anyway, if I had to pick one, that would be Freedom Beach: whitish sand, shades, resto, and somehow, it’s still tranquil.

Even if you don’t dive, you can still go snorkelling. Unfortunately, the only fun site is Shark Bay with the turtles, and every day at 4pm, literally everyone goes to the same spot. I was on my way too when the number of parking bikes became suspicious, then I looked down into the bay and saw the floating mass like the Great Pacific Garbage Patch. Hard skip.

PARTY

Honestly, I’m bored of pointless parties that are all about random (crap) loud music and drunk people. I always look for the vibe and the setting to get me. My picks for the evening are Baby Rasta or Sun Dance Bar.

I love Baby Rasta’s eclectic, randomly layered building where you can find your cozy spot. This is more about the atmosphere to get your chill. Sun Dance Bar is at the north end of Sairee Beach, a bit out of the buzz, but that only makes it better. The DJs have a great music taste, and you’ll be served with really strong cocktails at the boat bar (I loved the caipirinhas). Beach bars are mandatory for the evenings anyway; what else would you do after sunset, and where else would you talk about fishies, right?!

After you devoured and climbed the whole island, and the heat drained your vitality, only a good massage is left to bring you back to existence. The Kayo Healing Massage is not bad, and ladies, the waxing is also quite good and painless. Ultimately, Koh Tao is not the worst place to spend a week or two.

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